This book is very different to ‘I’m Ella. Buy Me’ which I read and reviewed in October last year. This is not a bad thing; it shows Joan’s marvellous writing talent at different genres. 

Guilt is dark and at times horrifying when reading what happens to Susan as she grows up with her parents. They show her not even one ounce of love. They are often cruel to her and it’s terrible to read, I felt really sorry for her.

The book is written as if Susan is talking to Mark her brother who died just before turning five. Susan feels terribly guilty about it as she was there as the accident occurred. She can’t remember part of what happened and this plays on her mind her whole life until she is forced to search for answers so that she can rescue her relationship with her son and husband.  

The most amazing thing was Susan’s childhood perspective. Reading how she genuinely trusted her mum and dad and craved their love and attention despite nothing but indifference, and that’s the best she is treated. It was heart breaking at times, and when she goes back to search for answers is also very sad and was worse than I imagined.

When she is having relationship issues I was just willing her to talk and explain what had happened in her childhood, Liam was so charming and I could see he really cared for Susan and wanted the best for both her and their son.   This book is short and easy to read in a few hours, especially as it is compulsive reading finding out what happened to Mark.

Gratefully received from the Author for review.

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